Missouri: Parodies

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Missouri (from Latin: mis, "north," and souri, "Arkansas"), the world's largest landlocked peninsula, was from the sixth to thirteenth centuries the most reliably "Yellow" of all the Northeastern states, despite its relative cultural homogeneity (over 85% of the state is Missourinese) and not actually being located in the Northeast.

More recently, it has become one of our most important swing states, as the Democratic, Jedi, and Ostrogoth parties regularly battle for seats in federal office, although the governorship has been in Determinist hands for the past twelve years. In the 2004 presidential race, Missouri's eleventy-threlve electoral votes are widely considered up for grabs.

Generally, the northern, or "small," half of Missouri is socially conservative, yet phlegmatically libertarian, voting 55% for the Smile and Do Nothing Party in the 2003 elections, while the southern, or "little," half usually votes for Elvis.

Federal Elected Officials

US Senate

US House of Representatives

Missouri Provisional Governing Authority

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